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KEITH LIVINGSTON β PARTS THERAPY
Integration for Habits, Conflicts and Decisions
If youβve done any work with smoking cessation, weight loss or any other form of habit control, youβve probably had an experience similar to thisβ¦
You reach a good level of trance, give wonderful suggestions, everything goes great as far as you can tell. The client calls you the next day and tells you they smoked as soon as they left your office.
Why did they smoke? Why didnβt your suggestions work?
Maybe you start to feel bad, lose your confidence, question the effectiveness of hypnosis. βMaybe Iβm just not good enough,β you say to yourself.
Now there are lots of hypnosis instructors out there that are still teaching based on an old, authoritarian dogma. Theyβll tell you that you didnβt have a deep enough trance. Theyβll tell you that you needed to repeat your suggestions more or put more emotion into them. Their entire approach is about βforcingβ the client to accept your suggestions.
But youβre smarter than that. You know thereβs got to be a better way.
The problem with simple, direct suggestion for smoking cessation, weight loss or other habits is that youβre setting your client up to battle with themselves internally.
In a trance, we suggest that a client eat better or stop smoking. Well, the part of them that enjoys smoking or motivates them to eat they way they do now is listening and saying βThat doesnβt sound too good to me. I think Iβll resist this suggestion.β
So youβve got part of the person behind you 100% and part of the person βresisting.β What comes next β a battle!
Let me ask you this. Letβs suppose you were involved in a negotiation between two parties. Would the best approach be to label one of the parties as βbad,β and start suggesting that it be gotten rid of? Well, thatβs what youβre doing if youβre using simple, direct suggestion to try to break a habit.
While direct suggestion adds power to the side that wants to change the habit, thereβs still a battle a brewing in the back of the clientβs mind (where the real power is). Will you be successful? Maybe, maybe not. Will the client get easy, elegant change? Probably not. Truly, youβll rarely be effective with this kind of client unless you get all the clientβs motivations on the same page and working toward the same goal.
What a Bank Manager Tells us about Habits
I remember having a conversation with my bank manager (Iβll call him Dan) several years ago. We were sitting at his neatly kept brown desk, in a busy bank lobby. He wanted to understand more about my hypnotherapy practice. Looking across the desk with a bit of a shaky voice (I think hypnosis scared him a little), he asked, βWhat is it you do exactly?β
βDan,β I asked, βIf you direct your arm to move with your mind will it move?β He looked and me strangely and said βYes, of course.β βHow about your leg? Do you control that too?β I got the feeling Dan was a little sorry heβd asked me but he played along. βSure.β
βWell,β I asked, βHave you ever made up your mind to do something, maybe to start exercising or be more polite to people or eat better or stop smoking and then not followed through?β
Of course, he had. Almost all of us have had the experience of deciding determinedly to start some new healthy, productive habit or stop some destructive one β and then dropping the ball. For Dan it was exercising.
βWell,β I said, βif your mind controls your arms, legs and the rest of your body and you made up your mind to exercise, why didnβt you?β
Poor Dan had no answer for that question. In fact, heβd never thought of it that way. How can people consciously make up their mindβs to do something and then not carry it out? Donβt we have control of ourselves?
People have multiple motivations going on at the same time β some of them at cross purposes.
I explained to Dan that human beings are not carved from a single block of stone. We may have more than one motivation present in us at a time. We may be conflicted.
β’Yes, we want to exercise but we also want to relax and take it easy.
β’Yes, we want to eat food that is good for us but we also may have incredible enjoyment out of eating that special something thatβs soooooo good (you know what it is).
β’Yes we want to stop smoking but we get something out of it.
I told Dan that I helped people to get those conflicting motivations all lined up so that they could live longer, better, more fulfilled lives. Thatβs what parts therapy is all about β getting all the motivations and resources of a client lined up and headed for the same goal.
Remember a time in your life when things were going incredibly well; almost magically. Progress was effortless and you didnβt have to motivate yourself β you acted without even thinking about it. Thatβs the experience of being fully congruent β all your inner motivations lined up toward one goal.
Now, you can get easy to follow, instructions to align the inner motivations of your clients. Discover the little known secrets of powerful parts therapy.
Effectively blast away even the most stubborn habits
About Keith Livingston
Keith LivingstonKeith Livingston is the main instructor for Hypnosis 101. Keith has been studying hypnosis since he was a boy and doing hypnosis & NLP training since 1997.
Mr. Livingston has worked for 2 nationally accredited institutions of higher learning and a state licensed vocational institution. He has participated in developing and writing several college-level courses from the ground up and teaching those same courses at a nationally accredited college.
Mr. Livingston is the author of βLearn Hypnosis @ Homeβ and βThe Phobia Self-Help Bookβ as well as numerous NLP and hypnosis programs for professionals and hobbyists. His βHypnosis Tipsβ newsletter goes out to thousands of hypnotherapists, NLP practitioners and budding hypnosis enthusiasts each month.
Mr. Livingston has spent more than a decade training people to become hypnotherapists and NLP masters; not only from the US, but from 16 other countries on 5 continents. Many have traveled halfway around the world to learn hypnosis from him. Heβs taught people from many backgrounds β doctors, lawyers, mental health counselors, CEOs, teachers, computer programmers, contractors, massage therapists, consultants, ministers, martial arts instructors, and moreβ¦
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